On this day four years ago we first learned that Friendship is Magic. Here is a lovely tribute to the series.
Just a little overthinking My Little Pony Friendship is Magic.
Friday, October 10, 2014
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
Retroactive Reviews - Inspiration Manifestation
The castle!
Spike's fire has several other ancillary uses
Second episode where Spike messes with a magic book this season
Was King Sombra corrupted by dark magic?
Transforming ponies into other ponies?!
Not bad. A bit more interesting than last week, but still kind of disappointing.
80/100
Spike's fire has several other ancillary uses
Second episode where Spike messes with a magic book this season
Was King Sombra corrupted by dark magic?
Transforming ponies into other ponies?!
Not bad. A bit more interesting than last week, but still kind of disappointing.
80/100
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
Retroactive Reviews 2 - Equestria Games
Look how long Scoots was able to hover!
Continuity from that episode where RD acted like a traitor!
"Last time you were here, you..." No. Last time he was here was during the princess summit where Twilight got her crown stolen, and nopony at the Crystal Empire cared one bit that Spike was there.
Multi-coloured dots for the crowd at the stadium? Looks like a lazy move to me. Especially considering all the other little details (and season 4 lighting) that pop up throughout the episode.
"Mr. The Dragon"
Pony bites his hooves and fingernails fly off!
Pretty blue fire
Nopony questioned the fire being BLUE when Spike's fire is GREEN (except Luna, but the possibility of Twi fudging the torch lighting being a major plot point, as Luna hinted, turned out to be a red herring, and I am disappointed)
Did somepony out fly Dash?!
Ice archery sounds like it would never really work
A cloud cannot freeze solid into a huge lump (it would turn into snow or hail)
And it would take hours to melt a solid chunk of ice that size, even if you tried to set fire to it (the US Navy tested using napalm to melt icebergs, and it was an utter failure, so what chance does Spike's fire have?)
And they would never disable Celestia's power, so she should have eliminated the ice threat instantly
Or Luna
Or Cadance
Or Shining Armor
Or ANY of the unicorn guard ponies! You definitely would not want to disable the magic of the security force, so why didn't they do anything? To force an ending where Spike saves the day.
Who wrote this episode? Took a look ... no surprise there. It's the undisputed king of bad episodes.
Extremely underwhelming episode. Let's face it, the Equestria Games could never have lived up to two seasons worth of hype, but I didn't think it would disappoint this much. So the moral is that you have to feel good about yourself or something? It could have been something about teamwork or cooperation or different groups of people putting their differences aside to celebrate athleticism, but it's another self-confidence episode, or something. I don't know. Spike's greatness seemed ridiculously blown out of proportion. Cadance bows to him twice here but at none of the other times they've met? Give me a break. The more I think about it the less I like this episode.
67/100
Continuity from that episode where RD acted like a traitor!
"Last time you were here, you..." No. Last time he was here was during the princess summit where Twilight got her crown stolen, and nopony at the Crystal Empire cared one bit that Spike was there.
Multi-coloured dots for the crowd at the stadium? Looks like a lazy move to me. Especially considering all the other little details (and season 4 lighting) that pop up throughout the episode.
"Mr. The Dragon"
Pony bites his hooves and fingernails fly off!
Pretty blue fire
Nopony questioned the fire being BLUE when Spike's fire is GREEN (except Luna, but the possibility of Twi fudging the torch lighting being a major plot point, as Luna hinted, turned out to be a red herring, and I am disappointed)
Did somepony out fly Dash?!
Ice archery sounds like it would never really work
A cloud cannot freeze solid into a huge lump (it would turn into snow or hail)
And it would take hours to melt a solid chunk of ice that size, even if you tried to set fire to it (the US Navy tested using napalm to melt icebergs, and it was an utter failure, so what chance does Spike's fire have?)
And they would never disable Celestia's power, so she should have eliminated the ice threat instantly
Or Luna
Or Cadance
Or Shining Armor
Or ANY of the unicorn guard ponies! You definitely would not want to disable the magic of the security force, so why didn't they do anything? To force an ending where Spike saves the day.
Who wrote this episode? Took a look ... no surprise there. It's the undisputed king of bad episodes.
Extremely underwhelming episode. Let's face it, the Equestria Games could never have lived up to two seasons worth of hype, but I didn't think it would disappoint this much. So the moral is that you have to feel good about yourself or something? It could have been something about teamwork or cooperation or different groups of people putting their differences aside to celebrate athleticism, but it's another self-confidence episode, or something. I don't know. Spike's greatness seemed ridiculously blown out of proportion. Cadance bows to him twice here but at none of the other times they've met? Give me a break. The more I think about it the less I like this episode.
67/100
Monday, September 29, 2014
Rainbow Rocks - Commentary and Review
I saw Rainbow Rocks at the first showing and I must say it was worth every pfennig (though I only have ten and they're not accepted as legal tender anywhere on Earth). I've written six pages of let's call it running commentary on the movie from memory, twelve hours after I saw it (so there might be a couple of mistakes). It's much more detailed than my normal reviews that I've just noticed I haven't been posting here very often. Well, here it is. Since the whole thing is outlined on MLP wiki and it's already up on Youtube I'm not too worried about spoilers. Just in case I'll put some arrow things, if y'all don't want to read it.
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Those short videos that have been released, the ones where Rarity and Fluttershy deal with the hamsters and Vinyl dances in the street, they appear nowhere in the movie. That was a surprise. The movie was short enough, only 75 minutes. They could have added the shorts to make it longer.
We begin as we have seen in the spoilers that have been officially released (I've done probably 80% of my best to avoid the unofficial spoilers) in the human world where Adagio Dazzle, Sonata Dusk (she's the adorable one), and Aria Blaze are in the shop feeding off of human misery when they spot the magic rainbow from the end of the first movie and Adagio conceives a plan to take over the world using the magic brought into this world with Twilight's crown (left over, after the crown was taken back).
Cue the first song during the opening credits: "Rainbow Rocks". It's cool.
Sunset Shimmer is uncomfortable in the auditorium, being ostracized by the other students, and finds a little relief with the mane five, who are always, unintentionally, bringing up what she did in the past, leading to frequent repetition of "no offense," "none taken." Tia and Lulu arrive and mention the Fall Formal, making things worse.
One very nice thing about this movie is the directionality of the sound. They shift the channels depending on where the character is, so you can tell if someone is to the right or left, and when they move the sound moves with them.
We then see the mane five practice, under the name The Rainbooms. Cue second song: "Better than Ever". A tear nearly snuck out of my eye when they sang "we're the Wondercolts forever." The girls get pony features when they sing, and not just from friendship, but also from excellence, as we see RD start to develop features alone when she's acting like a total jerk. Flutters wants to sing the song she wrote, but RD is being an even bigger narcissistic, egotistical jerk than usual (and that's saying something) and is actually mean to Flutters. Rarity wants to pick out costumes for the band and AJ is also mean and dismissive, in an odd way. She had little problem with Rarity picking out the dresses for the Fall Formal, and she has to know that bands don't just wear anything, but the writers need to add the seed of conflict. Pinkie Pie doesn't like the arguing, but not because it's not productive or is totally unnecessary or is not what friendship is about, but because she's bored of it. Herein lies three of the main problems that will turn up again and again throughout the movie. They are a significant plot point, so pay attention.
Flash, aka Brad, aka waifu thief, bursts in looking for waifus to steal (he wants to know if Twi will be there). AJ says no and Flash leaves in dejection.
Sunny is called by the principal to introduce the new students, who are the villains, to the school. More Sonatabetes.
Jump to the cafeteria, and the next song: "Battle of the Bands". We see that the mane five, plus Sunny, are the only ones immune to the villains' powers. It is a very sensual song, with a lot of curvy ladies moving about enticingly, from interesting angles, caressing people, and uncrossing their legs. The camera does seem to linger on certain things more than I expected. Hot damn, they're taking risks with this movie.
And all of this was spoiled. Officially. Almost the first fifteen minutes were revealed by Hasbro on the Internet. Nearly one fifth the whole movie was given away for free. This is simultaneously my biggest gripe and the very thing that led me to spend actual money on the movie. Had I not seen those clips, going off just the shorts that serve as a sort of prequel, I would have thought this would be terrible and never have gone. The official spoilers made me realise how awesome this was going to be.
Tia and Lulu are under the villain's hypno magic spell, so they turn to the last bit of magic they know: Sunny's book. She uses it to write letters to Celestia, like Twi, only without the need for a dragon. Of course we never learned of this before, but that's okay. They don't know if it will work, but it does, or the movie would end right there.
Cut to the only pony part of the whole movie. Ponyville is as it was after Tirek destroyed it, so weeks, maybe months have passed since the previous movie. The other copy of the book is now in Twi's possession. She reads that her human friends (and Sunny) are in trouble and has to think of a way to help. She reads up on the villains, who turn out to be sirens. Starswirl banished them to Earth (thanks a lot) a really long time ago, which means that even though they look like high school students they're really hundreds of years old, which means they're not jailbait, they're sexy grannies. It also means they are immortal.
Twi hooks the book up to the mirror, says some science-y bullshit, and then bypasses the thirty moons restriction. She tells her friends to stay behind, because it's not like we've had a ton of episodes where telling your friends to stay behind turned out to be a really bad idea. She goes through the portal with Spike and that's the last we ever see of ponies.
She enters human world and is met with a group hug that leaves poor Sunny high and dry. It's so sad how people treat her until the very end. That's a plot point, pay attention.
They figure they have to stop the villains quickly, so they barge into the auditorium and try to do their friendship beam but it doesn't work, because without the crown music is the only thing that can activate magic, for some reason. Now they have to enter the battle of the bands and use a musical "counter spell" to activate the friendship beam. The entire onus of the task is foisted upon Twi, who tries to tell everyone she can't do it alone, but they don't listen because they are preoccupied with previous plot points. These are all plot points, pay attention.
Lyra and Bon Bon are there, together.
Twi goes to sleep in the library, but Pinkie Pie insists she and everyone else, and Sunny, stay at her house. We get to see them all looking cute in their pyjamas (AJ's got feet!). AJ and RD are playing a Mane-iac video game, and just before AJ wins RD turns off the power, then taunts AJ. Dear Lord, RD has become a total jerkass by this point. Why would anyone EVER want to spend time with her?
When everyone is asleep Twi sneaks into the kitchen to write her song, when Sunny comes in and asks if she can help. She opens the refrigerizor to discover it is entirely full of whipped cream, which she eats off her fingers (it's getting hot in here?). They are interrupted by Maud (who is stunning in human form), who seems to have gone full retard, pouring crackers on a "hungry" Boulder, making a mess throughout the house as she walks away. Twi and Sunny almost get to the point where Twi asks for help, but she backs down at the last second.
The next day the song isn't working. They practice in AJ's barn. One of them says "at least we're better than the last time" and Big Mac walks past the window for the sole purpose of saying "nope." People cracked up over that one. Daft Punk reference. Well, without the spell they have to win the battle of the bands the old fashioned way, by being good singers. Those designated arguments start up again. Remember them? You were paying attention, weren't you?
At school Snips and Snails try to rap, badly, and lose right away though they think they're so cool. The mane six sing next, cue next song: "Shake Your Tail" (a different version than the one that was released months ago). Rarity is wearing a coat with metal dangly bits. For some reason Photo Finish uses magnets to sabotage her. AJ doesn't seem to care that it wasn't Rarity's fault. Snips and Snails chase Flutters with a spotlight, Pinkie's party cannon almost chokes Twi to death and something else happens that I don't remember. They argue some more, but they're good enough to move on.
Derpy has a band of what I can only assume are background ponies, and they all play strange quasi instruments: a cow bell and a triangle, and Derpy plays a saw. It's cool.
Cue montage. We're gonna' need a montage! Ooo it takes a montage! Show lots of things happening at once; remind everyone what's going on! To show it all would take too long. Even Rocky had a montage. While The Dazzlings sing "Under Our Spell" we see the progression of the contest. We see the CMC in their Show Stoppers outfits and flashing lights, Snowflake beats Lyra and Bon Bon (who are playing piano together, rubbing cheeks, almost adopting fannon completely) with a violin that is four sizes too small, the mane six beat Octy (who speaks one line, for the first time ever), and Brad's band beats someone, before themselves getting beaten (Brad, under the siren spell, hates Twi, and he made her cry).
The mane six play the Jerk's song about how she's the best person in the universe and everyone else sucks (seriously, what is magic again? I think I know why the friendship beam didn't work the first time). It rots, but RD is so in love with herself that she almost transforms. Sunny can't let the villains see her transform, so she tackles her and everyone gets pissed off. More pissed off.
Trixie plays a song "Tricks up My Sleeve". It is... interesting. And kind of long, and kind of like a filler song. Trixie plays the role of minor villain. This is a plot point, pay attention. Trixie is better, but the villains hypnotise Tia, who lets the mane six win. Trixie gets pissed and the next day, when the mane six are about to perform, she opens a trap door and traps them beneath the stage. Since the mane six can't be found Trixie takes their spot and performs again.
Beneath the stage everyone is fighting even more. This allows the villains to suck up their magic and they use it to transform themselves into anthros (pony ears, tails, and bat wings) with glowing red eyes. It's a very cool transformation. Sunny jumps in and saves the day. She points out the obvious, that all those plot points I told you to remember are the reason they can't make the magic work. Everyone atones. AJ accepts Rarity's outfits, and RD accepts Flutters' song. That door RD had been banging on for hours opens up. Turns out it opens in, not out. Spike brought Vinyl to help. Her headphones cancel out the siren spell. She also has a car that transforms into an amp.
The villains are singing their song and are just about ready to take over when the heroes sing back. The villains release their siren forms (which look like sea ponies) to physically do battle with the mane six, who have transformed into their anthro forms as well, and they almost win, but Twi finally asks Sunny for help and she picks up the mic and starts to sing. She takes her coat off, so you know this shit's just got real, revealing a nice backless top she never wore before. She transforms too, into good mode this time. Together their singing creates a giant alicorn of light which destroys the villains' pendants and busts them down to normal. They try to sing, to regain control of the crowd, but now their singing sucks and they run away in shame.
Brad hugs Twi, and Sunny reveals she's a totally awesome guitar player and she's now a permanent part of the band. Twi leaves. Sometime in the future Sunny is writing to Twi through the magic book, which allows the portal to be opened at any time. It's really sweet.
There is no pony bit at the end like last time. We go straight to the credits, and they are lovely. Last time there were just scrolling words, with Derpy at the very end, but this time there are a series of very lovely drawings of many of the characters. The song "Shine Like Rainbows" plays.
At the very end, after the credits, we see someone looking over a wall of pictures and charts centered around Canterlot High. It is human Twilight with her real dog Spike (first alluded to by Pinkie Pie in the previous movie). She is certain that something profoundly unusual is going on there.
They took a lot more risks with this movie than the last one, which was mostly bronybait. Sunny actually says she transformed into a demon and in the final song battle the word soul is used. In this fundamaterialistic naytheist progressive age anything that even remotely resembles religion is strictly forbidden, no matter how non-specific, so that was something to see. Adagio calls her comrades idiots, and in this progressive age where words don't mean things anymore anything that sounds like shaming people who are not "neurotypical" (a bullshit, made up word for normal people) is strictly forbidden. Lyrabon shipping. This one actually has nothing to do with progressivism, it has to do with how fandoms work. Shippers will go down with their ships, and anytime one particular ship is even hinted at officially it is going to piss a lot of people off. Lastly, there is a whole lot of sexy movement and camera angles. That is what surprised me most. It was nothing compared to actual high school (which would have to have a lot of stuff cut just to get an R rating), but for My Little Pony, I never expected that.
But none of that bothered me. They were the good kind of surprises (not the bad kind, like IRS surprises). There were three things I didn't like: 1. the movie was really short, 2. Maud, who is writing her PhD dissertation on geology, can't be so retarded that she would dump crackers on Boulder expecting him to really eat them, and 3. RD has turned into a total jerkass for no evident reason. I can't imagine how RD could have gone from where she was at the end of the first movie, at most a couple months earlier, to being a complete jerk, who is so unbelievably mean to all her friends that she makes the rumors Sunny spread in the first movie look small in comparison. Seriousry? She's Gilda bad. Her jerkness was the only thing that turned me off, and the only thing that deducted points from an otherwise perfect movie.
My final rating is 94/100. I can't possibly recommend seeing this in person enough (or at least buying the Blu-ray when it comes out 28 October).
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Those short videos that have been released, the ones where Rarity and Fluttershy deal with the hamsters and Vinyl dances in the street, they appear nowhere in the movie. That was a surprise. The movie was short enough, only 75 minutes. They could have added the shorts to make it longer.
We begin as we have seen in the spoilers that have been officially released (I've done probably 80% of my best to avoid the unofficial spoilers) in the human world where Adagio Dazzle, Sonata Dusk (she's the adorable one), and Aria Blaze are in the shop feeding off of human misery when they spot the magic rainbow from the end of the first movie and Adagio conceives a plan to take over the world using the magic brought into this world with Twilight's crown (left over, after the crown was taken back).
Cue the first song during the opening credits: "Rainbow Rocks". It's cool.
Sunset Shimmer is uncomfortable in the auditorium, being ostracized by the other students, and finds a little relief with the mane five, who are always, unintentionally, bringing up what she did in the past, leading to frequent repetition of "no offense," "none taken." Tia and Lulu arrive and mention the Fall Formal, making things worse.
One very nice thing about this movie is the directionality of the sound. They shift the channels depending on where the character is, so you can tell if someone is to the right or left, and when they move the sound moves with them.
We then see the mane five practice, under the name The Rainbooms. Cue second song: "Better than Ever". A tear nearly snuck out of my eye when they sang "we're the Wondercolts forever." The girls get pony features when they sing, and not just from friendship, but also from excellence, as we see RD start to develop features alone when she's acting like a total jerk. Flutters wants to sing the song she wrote, but RD is being an even bigger narcissistic, egotistical jerk than usual (and that's saying something) and is actually mean to Flutters. Rarity wants to pick out costumes for the band and AJ is also mean and dismissive, in an odd way. She had little problem with Rarity picking out the dresses for the Fall Formal, and she has to know that bands don't just wear anything, but the writers need to add the seed of conflict. Pinkie Pie doesn't like the arguing, but not because it's not productive or is totally unnecessary or is not what friendship is about, but because she's bored of it. Herein lies three of the main problems that will turn up again and again throughout the movie. They are a significant plot point, so pay attention.
Flash, aka Brad, aka waifu thief, bursts in looking for waifus to steal (he wants to know if Twi will be there). AJ says no and Flash leaves in dejection.
Sunny is called by the principal to introduce the new students, who are the villains, to the school. More Sonatabetes.
Jump to the cafeteria, and the next song: "Battle of the Bands". We see that the mane five, plus Sunny, are the only ones immune to the villains' powers. It is a very sensual song, with a lot of curvy ladies moving about enticingly, from interesting angles, caressing people, and uncrossing their legs. The camera does seem to linger on certain things more than I expected. Hot damn, they're taking risks with this movie.
And all of this was spoiled. Officially. Almost the first fifteen minutes were revealed by Hasbro on the Internet. Nearly one fifth the whole movie was given away for free. This is simultaneously my biggest gripe and the very thing that led me to spend actual money on the movie. Had I not seen those clips, going off just the shorts that serve as a sort of prequel, I would have thought this would be terrible and never have gone. The official spoilers made me realise how awesome this was going to be.
Tia and Lulu are under the villain's hypno magic spell, so they turn to the last bit of magic they know: Sunny's book. She uses it to write letters to Celestia, like Twi, only without the need for a dragon. Of course we never learned of this before, but that's okay. They don't know if it will work, but it does, or the movie would end right there.
Cut to the only pony part of the whole movie. Ponyville is as it was after Tirek destroyed it, so weeks, maybe months have passed since the previous movie. The other copy of the book is now in Twi's possession. She reads that her human friends (and Sunny) are in trouble and has to think of a way to help. She reads up on the villains, who turn out to be sirens. Starswirl banished them to Earth (thanks a lot) a really long time ago, which means that even though they look like high school students they're really hundreds of years old, which means they're not jailbait, they're sexy grannies. It also means they are immortal.
Twi hooks the book up to the mirror, says some science-y bullshit, and then bypasses the thirty moons restriction. She tells her friends to stay behind, because it's not like we've had a ton of episodes where telling your friends to stay behind turned out to be a really bad idea. She goes through the portal with Spike and that's the last we ever see of ponies.
She enters human world and is met with a group hug that leaves poor Sunny high and dry. It's so sad how people treat her until the very end. That's a plot point, pay attention.
They figure they have to stop the villains quickly, so they barge into the auditorium and try to do their friendship beam but it doesn't work, because without the crown music is the only thing that can activate magic, for some reason. Now they have to enter the battle of the bands and use a musical "counter spell" to activate the friendship beam. The entire onus of the task is foisted upon Twi, who tries to tell everyone she can't do it alone, but they don't listen because they are preoccupied with previous plot points. These are all plot points, pay attention.
Lyra and Bon Bon are there, together.
Twi goes to sleep in the library, but Pinkie Pie insists she and everyone else, and Sunny, stay at her house. We get to see them all looking cute in their pyjamas (AJ's got feet!). AJ and RD are playing a Mane-iac video game, and just before AJ wins RD turns off the power, then taunts AJ. Dear Lord, RD has become a total jerkass by this point. Why would anyone EVER want to spend time with her?
When everyone is asleep Twi sneaks into the kitchen to write her song, when Sunny comes in and asks if she can help. She opens the refrigerizor to discover it is entirely full of whipped cream, which she eats off her fingers (it's getting hot in here?). They are interrupted by Maud (who is stunning in human form), who seems to have gone full retard, pouring crackers on a "hungry" Boulder, making a mess throughout the house as she walks away. Twi and Sunny almost get to the point where Twi asks for help, but she backs down at the last second.
The next day the song isn't working. They practice in AJ's barn. One of them says "at least we're better than the last time" and Big Mac walks past the window for the sole purpose of saying "nope." People cracked up over that one. Daft Punk reference. Well, without the spell they have to win the battle of the bands the old fashioned way, by being good singers. Those designated arguments start up again. Remember them? You were paying attention, weren't you?
At school Snips and Snails try to rap, badly, and lose right away though they think they're so cool. The mane six sing next, cue next song: "Shake Your Tail" (a different version than the one that was released months ago). Rarity is wearing a coat with metal dangly bits. For some reason Photo Finish uses magnets to sabotage her. AJ doesn't seem to care that it wasn't Rarity's fault. Snips and Snails chase Flutters with a spotlight, Pinkie's party cannon almost chokes Twi to death and something else happens that I don't remember. They argue some more, but they're good enough to move on.
Derpy has a band of what I can only assume are background ponies, and they all play strange quasi instruments: a cow bell and a triangle, and Derpy plays a saw. It's cool.
Cue montage. We're gonna' need a montage! Ooo it takes a montage! Show lots of things happening at once; remind everyone what's going on! To show it all would take too long. Even Rocky had a montage. While The Dazzlings sing "Under Our Spell" we see the progression of the contest. We see the CMC in their Show Stoppers outfits and flashing lights, Snowflake beats Lyra and Bon Bon (who are playing piano together, rubbing cheeks, almost adopting fannon completely) with a violin that is four sizes too small, the mane six beat Octy (who speaks one line, for the first time ever), and Brad's band beats someone, before themselves getting beaten (Brad, under the siren spell, hates Twi, and he made her cry).
The mane six play the Jerk's song about how she's the best person in the universe and everyone else sucks (seriously, what is magic again? I think I know why the friendship beam didn't work the first time). It rots, but RD is so in love with herself that she almost transforms. Sunny can't let the villains see her transform, so she tackles her and everyone gets pissed off. More pissed off.
Trixie plays a song "Tricks up My Sleeve". It is... interesting. And kind of long, and kind of like a filler song. Trixie plays the role of minor villain. This is a plot point, pay attention. Trixie is better, but the villains hypnotise Tia, who lets the mane six win. Trixie gets pissed and the next day, when the mane six are about to perform, she opens a trap door and traps them beneath the stage. Since the mane six can't be found Trixie takes their spot and performs again.
Beneath the stage everyone is fighting even more. This allows the villains to suck up their magic and they use it to transform themselves into anthros (pony ears, tails, and bat wings) with glowing red eyes. It's a very cool transformation. Sunny jumps in and saves the day. She points out the obvious, that all those plot points I told you to remember are the reason they can't make the magic work. Everyone atones. AJ accepts Rarity's outfits, and RD accepts Flutters' song. That door RD had been banging on for hours opens up. Turns out it opens in, not out. Spike brought Vinyl to help. Her headphones cancel out the siren spell. She also has a car that transforms into an amp.
The villains are singing their song and are just about ready to take over when the heroes sing back. The villains release their siren forms (which look like sea ponies) to physically do battle with the mane six, who have transformed into their anthro forms as well, and they almost win, but Twi finally asks Sunny for help and she picks up the mic and starts to sing. She takes her coat off, so you know this shit's just got real, revealing a nice backless top she never wore before. She transforms too, into good mode this time. Together their singing creates a giant alicorn of light which destroys the villains' pendants and busts them down to normal. They try to sing, to regain control of the crowd, but now their singing sucks and they run away in shame.
Brad hugs Twi, and Sunny reveals she's a totally awesome guitar player and she's now a permanent part of the band. Twi leaves. Sometime in the future Sunny is writing to Twi through the magic book, which allows the portal to be opened at any time. It's really sweet.
There is no pony bit at the end like last time. We go straight to the credits, and they are lovely. Last time there were just scrolling words, with Derpy at the very end, but this time there are a series of very lovely drawings of many of the characters. The song "Shine Like Rainbows" plays.
At the very end, after the credits, we see someone looking over a wall of pictures and charts centered around Canterlot High. It is human Twilight with her real dog Spike (first alluded to by Pinkie Pie in the previous movie). She is certain that something profoundly unusual is going on there.
They took a lot more risks with this movie than the last one, which was mostly bronybait. Sunny actually says she transformed into a demon and in the final song battle the word soul is used. In this fundamaterialistic naytheist progressive age anything that even remotely resembles religion is strictly forbidden, no matter how non-specific, so that was something to see. Adagio calls her comrades idiots, and in this progressive age where words don't mean things anymore anything that sounds like shaming people who are not "neurotypical" (a bullshit, made up word for normal people) is strictly forbidden. Lyrabon shipping. This one actually has nothing to do with progressivism, it has to do with how fandoms work. Shippers will go down with their ships, and anytime one particular ship is even hinted at officially it is going to piss a lot of people off. Lastly, there is a whole lot of sexy movement and camera angles. That is what surprised me most. It was nothing compared to actual high school (which would have to have a lot of stuff cut just to get an R rating), but for My Little Pony, I never expected that.
But none of that bothered me. They were the good kind of surprises (not the bad kind, like IRS surprises). There were three things I didn't like: 1. the movie was really short, 2. Maud, who is writing her PhD dissertation on geology, can't be so retarded that she would dump crackers on Boulder expecting him to really eat them, and 3. RD has turned into a total jerkass for no evident reason. I can't imagine how RD could have gone from where she was at the end of the first movie, at most a couple months earlier, to being a complete jerk, who is so unbelievably mean to all her friends that she makes the rumors Sunny spread in the first movie look small in comparison. Seriousry? She's Gilda bad. Her jerkness was the only thing that turned me off, and the only thing that deducted points from an otherwise perfect movie.
My final rating is 94/100. I can't possibly recommend seeing this in person enough (or at least buying the Blu-ray when it comes out 28 October).
Retroactive Reviews 1 - Twilight's Kingdom parts 1 and 2
I've written reviews of all the episodes of season 4 but I haven't posted very many. Well, here they are, in reverse order.
Part 1
Sad Twi. Somepony needs a hug.
Horse joke ("why the long face?")
Flash!
Persian ponies look cool
Book! Just like the first episode
So, was the Cerberus thing and the release of Tirek planned all the way in season 2 or did they just fit it in now?
I don't know. Looking at the time, I'm thinking the first song could have been cut. It was good, just not necessary.
92/100 for part 1
Part 2
That battle was intense! They just put so much coolness in everywhere.
Somehow they fit the rainbow power designs in without making me cringe. I think everything else was just so cool that I ignored it or something. Actually I think it would have been better if this was a surprise, instead of something that was spoiled months ago to sell toys. It could have been "hey, here's something new, buy it!" instead of "hey, here's something for you to buy so we have to work into the story!" I'm not at all bothered that they're trying to sell these things, I just think they could have marketed them a lot better.
And Twi's castle is a tree house
The ending was rushed just a little bit, but it didn't take any points away from the episode
This is probably my favourite episode
100/100 for part 2
Part 1
Sad Twi. Somepony needs a hug.
Horse joke ("why the long face?")
Flash!
Persian ponies look cool
Book! Just like the first episode
So, was the Cerberus thing and the release of Tirek planned all the way in season 2 or did they just fit it in now?
I don't know. Looking at the time, I'm thinking the first song could have been cut. It was good, just not necessary.
92/100 for part 1
Part 2
That battle was intense! They just put so much coolness in everywhere.
Somehow they fit the rainbow power designs in without making me cringe. I think everything else was just so cool that I ignored it or something. Actually I think it would have been better if this was a surprise, instead of something that was spoiled months ago to sell toys. It could have been "hey, here's something new, buy it!" instead of "hey, here's something for you to buy so we have to work into the story!" I'm not at all bothered that they're trying to sell these things, I just think they could have marketed them a lot better.
And Twi's castle is a tree house
The ending was rushed just a little bit, but it didn't take any points away from the episode
This is probably my favourite episode
100/100 for part 2
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Thursday, April 17, 2014
My Little Pony: Origins Review
You've seen the original My Little Pony/ Rescue at Midnight Castle special in the previous post. Now here's my review. Big spoilers.
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Pegasus Firefly, unicorn Twilight, and earth pony Applejack are playing with their friends outside when all of a sudden (literally in the first two or three minutes) all hell breaks loose. Scorpan, a bat-winged hairy guy, is riding a dragon and leading a group of other dragons and he captures one of the ponies. Back at the Midnight Castle his boss, Tirac, a giant centaur, is really pissed off that he didn't manage to get the necessary four ponies he asked for to complete his evil plan.
Firefly flies up into the sky to get help and apparently ends up at Earth where she crashes into a well. A girl named Megan, who has a normal non-talking pony, pulls her out. Megan is not the least bit surprised that the creature she pulled out of the well is a brash and impulsive pegasus who can talk. I think if that happened to just about anyone else one would be filled with shock and disbelief, but, apparently, Megan finds this completely normal. Firefly tells her that she is the only hope the ponies have of survival and Megan agrees to fly with her back to the horse world (I don't think they named it at this point).
Scorpan is back, catches three more ponies, and Megan, but Firefly knocks her out of the dragon's claws. She falls to the ground and Scorpan of all people (or beast men) saves her life, catching her, bringing her gently to the ground, and warning her that she should get to safety. And then she gets pissed at him after he just saved her from splatting on the ground!
They go off to the rescue their friends at the castle, crossing the most broken down bridge in the history of bridges (just who made it? Who made the castle the ponies live in anyway? They don't seem capable of doing humanoid activities like construction work.). Applejack falls into a river, Megan dives in after her, and they get trapped inside a giant clam.
Then come the sea ponies. And they sing. For no reason whatsoever. They push the pair up to the surface of the water.
Back at the Midnight Castle Tirac is pissed at Scorpan because one of the ponies, Ember, is too young. He threatens the life of Spike, Scorpan's baby dragon friend/pet? and then opens a bag that beats like the tell tale heart and magic dust turns the three ponies into horrible tusked monsters.
They find a gnome named Mr. Moochick who tells them all that Tirac needs the four ponies to bring about endless night. How he knows this is not explained. In fact, nothing is explained really. But he does sing. There's a lot of singing. The only thing that can stop Tirac is a rainbow of light. And his Bugs Bunny like friend had it hiding in his trousers the whole time.
The sea ponies ferry the group (which includes a blue pony I'm not sure they named) across yet another river so they can sneek into the Midnight Castle. Those things are so annoying.
Scorpan turns out to really be a good guy, or at least not evil enough to want to destroy the world, so he busts Spike and Ember out of prison and tries to save the other ponies from Tirac and his goons. He's not quick enough. Applejack becomes the fourth pony to be turned into a monster and Tirac leaves to bring about forever night. Scorpan nearly dies trying to stop him, and we find out that blue pony's name is Bow Tie, even though there is absolutley no way Spike could have known.
The rainbow blows Tirac to smithereens, turns the ponies back to normal, turns Tirac's goons into animals, and Scorpan turns back into the prince who rules the land that Tirac had conquered. In the closing credits Firefly brings Megan back to Earth.
One of my biggest complaints with the new series is something I call Rushed Ending Syndrome, where the setup is really good, everything flows nicely to the climax, and then an ending is shoehorned into two or three minutes when it could have taken ten to properly explain everything. Well, Rescue at Midnight Castle suffers from what I guess you could call Rushed Everything Syndrome. Nothing is explained at all. The whole first sea pony scene is forced in just to introduce the sea ponies so they make sense the second time they appear, but that sequence could have been cut and replaced with something that actually explains more of the story.
Where did Tirac come from? Why did he want to destroy the world? Why did he need four ponies to complete his evil plan? How did the gnome guy get the rainbow in the first place? How did he know anything at all about Tirac's evil plan? How did Firefly know how to get to Earth, and how did she know one little girl would be able to save everyone? How did any of this make sense?
This short film could have been three or four times longer. It would have greatly benefitted from a full 80 minute cinematic treatment. Unfortunately, it's far too short to explain anything that happened. I felt I had watched the highly abridged version.
The similarities between this and the first two episodes of Friendship is Magic are astonishing. They tell the same story in slightly different ways. That's cool.
The animation is good, the voices are good, there was huge potential to make this into something amazing if it was longer than 22 minutes, but rushing through absolutely everything and not giving one single bit of explanation for anything that happened is going to cost this some serious points.
73/100
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Pegasus Firefly, unicorn Twilight, and earth pony Applejack are playing with their friends outside when all of a sudden (literally in the first two or three minutes) all hell breaks loose. Scorpan, a bat-winged hairy guy, is riding a dragon and leading a group of other dragons and he captures one of the ponies. Back at the Midnight Castle his boss, Tirac, a giant centaur, is really pissed off that he didn't manage to get the necessary four ponies he asked for to complete his evil plan.
Firefly flies up into the sky to get help and apparently ends up at Earth where she crashes into a well. A girl named Megan, who has a normal non-talking pony, pulls her out. Megan is not the least bit surprised that the creature she pulled out of the well is a brash and impulsive pegasus who can talk. I think if that happened to just about anyone else one would be filled with shock and disbelief, but, apparently, Megan finds this completely normal. Firefly tells her that she is the only hope the ponies have of survival and Megan agrees to fly with her back to the horse world (I don't think they named it at this point).
Scorpan is back, catches three more ponies, and Megan, but Firefly knocks her out of the dragon's claws. She falls to the ground and Scorpan of all people (or beast men) saves her life, catching her, bringing her gently to the ground, and warning her that she should get to safety. And then she gets pissed at him after he just saved her from splatting on the ground!
They go off to the rescue their friends at the castle, crossing the most broken down bridge in the history of bridges (just who made it? Who made the castle the ponies live in anyway? They don't seem capable of doing humanoid activities like construction work.). Applejack falls into a river, Megan dives in after her, and they get trapped inside a giant clam.
Then come the sea ponies. And they sing. For no reason whatsoever. They push the pair up to the surface of the water.
Back at the Midnight Castle Tirac is pissed at Scorpan because one of the ponies, Ember, is too young. He threatens the life of Spike, Scorpan's baby dragon friend/pet? and then opens a bag that beats like the tell tale heart and magic dust turns the three ponies into horrible tusked monsters.
They find a gnome named Mr. Moochick who tells them all that Tirac needs the four ponies to bring about endless night. How he knows this is not explained. In fact, nothing is explained really. But he does sing. There's a lot of singing. The only thing that can stop Tirac is a rainbow of light. And his Bugs Bunny like friend had it hiding in his trousers the whole time.
The sea ponies ferry the group (which includes a blue pony I'm not sure they named) across yet another river so they can sneek into the Midnight Castle. Those things are so annoying.
Scorpan turns out to really be a good guy, or at least not evil enough to want to destroy the world, so he busts Spike and Ember out of prison and tries to save the other ponies from Tirac and his goons. He's not quick enough. Applejack becomes the fourth pony to be turned into a monster and Tirac leaves to bring about forever night. Scorpan nearly dies trying to stop him, and we find out that blue pony's name is Bow Tie, even though there is absolutley no way Spike could have known.
The rainbow blows Tirac to smithereens, turns the ponies back to normal, turns Tirac's goons into animals, and Scorpan turns back into the prince who rules the land that Tirac had conquered. In the closing credits Firefly brings Megan back to Earth.
One of my biggest complaints with the new series is something I call Rushed Ending Syndrome, where the setup is really good, everything flows nicely to the climax, and then an ending is shoehorned into two or three minutes when it could have taken ten to properly explain everything. Well, Rescue at Midnight Castle suffers from what I guess you could call Rushed Everything Syndrome. Nothing is explained at all. The whole first sea pony scene is forced in just to introduce the sea ponies so they make sense the second time they appear, but that sequence could have been cut and replaced with something that actually explains more of the story.
Where did Tirac come from? Why did he want to destroy the world? Why did he need four ponies to complete his evil plan? How did the gnome guy get the rainbow in the first place? How did he know anything at all about Tirac's evil plan? How did Firefly know how to get to Earth, and how did she know one little girl would be able to save everyone? How did any of this make sense?
This short film could have been three or four times longer. It would have greatly benefitted from a full 80 minute cinematic treatment. Unfortunately, it's far too short to explain anything that happened. I felt I had watched the highly abridged version.
The similarities between this and the first two episodes of Friendship is Magic are astonishing. They tell the same story in slightly different ways. That's cool.
The animation is good, the voices are good, there was huge potential to make this into something amazing if it was longer than 22 minutes, but rushing through absolutely everything and not giving one single bit of explanation for anything that happened is going to cost this some serious points.
73/100
My Little Pony: Origins
30 years ago the original My Little Pony TV special aired 16 April 1984. Watch below. Runs 22 minutes.
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Sunday, March 2, 2014
Sunday, February 16, 2014
Filli Vanilli
That rabbit has some sort of weird growth. How does it get in and out of its warren?
I really like Toe-Tapper's eighth note star cutie mark.
Leave it to a real chatterbox like Big Mac to lose his voice.
Pinkie Pie took a level in JERK this episode. To whom was she nice? Nopony.
Zipporwhill is new cutest pony. It doesn't matter if Scootaloo is a sad, disabled orphan, she has lost the title of cutest pony that she has defended so vigorously since season one.
Fluttershy looks really cute in her green sweater, though I'm not sure how easy it would be to squeeze her wings through the holes.
This episode had one of the best songs of the season. At the very least a real Ponytones EP should be released. I'd buy it.
This was a very simple episode with a lot of callbacks to earlier episodes, which I really like. Everything (except Pinkie) was really sweet. I didn't even mind the season four lighting when Flutters was singing to the animals, and I'm not sure, but I don't think Derpy was their either, or at least she didn't appear right in front of the main action that I was trying to pay attention to! For its one flaw this falls just short of best episode of the season.
94/100.
I really like Toe-Tapper's eighth note star cutie mark.
Leave it to a real chatterbox like Big Mac to lose his voice.
Pinkie Pie took a level in JERK this episode. To whom was she nice? Nopony.
Zipporwhill is new cutest pony. It doesn't matter if Scootaloo is a sad, disabled orphan, she has lost the title of cutest pony that she has defended so vigorously since season one.
Fluttershy looks really cute in her green sweater, though I'm not sure how easy it would be to squeeze her wings through the holes.
This episode had one of the best songs of the season. At the very least a real Ponytones EP should be released. I'd buy it.
This was a very simple episode with a lot of callbacks to earlier episodes, which I really like. Everything (except Pinkie) was really sweet. I didn't even mind the season four lighting when Flutters was singing to the animals, and I'm not sure, but I don't think Derpy was their either, or at least she didn't appear right in front of the main action that I was trying to pay attention to! For its one flaw this falls just short of best episode of the season.
94/100.
Friday, February 14, 2014
Affluence And Apathy, or Why I Love Rarity
I can say with the utmost confidence that, while other ponies and all their special episodes may disappoint, without any question, there has never been nor will there likely ever be a disappointing episode focusing on Rarity. Consistently she remains top notch, above and beyond others in excellence and grace. She stands as a beacon overlooking all the pageantry, bizarre little oddities (Over A Barrel), and endless parades of Dash getting away with absolutely everything like some grand scale karma Houdini. Unlike all the others, who may at times descend into madness (or "go cupcakes"), Rarity manages to hold onto her poise and grace while always finding it in herself to give to her fullest ability to anypony in need.
One need no other example than Sisterhooves Social where she put aside all comfort for the sake of her sister, going so far as to disguise herself as Applejack and get as dirty as possible. She did it all gladly for Sweetie Belle, who was an obnoxious, selfish jackass (like all, or certainly most, little kids). She was able to maintain her grace even among the diamond dogs worst attempts at breaking her. She never lost her head, she never sank to their level, she just bit her lip, bore the discomfort of their imprisonment, and used her wits to extricate herself from captivity.
Time and again Rarity reveals to us that she is no one trick pony like so many others. AJ is still the rough and tumble farmer's daughter, Twi is still the anal nerd, Dash is still the asshole Mary Sue, Pinkie Pie still teeters on the brink of cupcakes, and Fluttershy still warns us to beware the quiet ones. Contrasted against the others Rarity has a depth of personality that is unrivaled by the rest of the mane six put together. She has beauty, brains, and heart, sense and style, cleverness, compassion, and propriety all rolled into one fabulous package. I dare say Rarity is everything anypony could ever want in a girl. She'll go on a quest to slay the dragon and look stunning doing it. She'll work herself to exhaustion for her friends. She'll put others before herself and bear the slings required of the peace keeper. She may go overboard at times, but everypony does and Rarity is certainly not above apologising for her wrongs.
It is for all that that I hold Rarity up as an example for us all, especially in these troubled times.
The problem of the world today is the disease of Affluenza, which isn't really a disease, but neither is ADHD or depression, even though drug companies make billions off of both, so why not add one more, and one that is so troubling to so many millions?
First permit me to clarify. I'm not saying that there are not people who actually have ADHD or depression, just that they are not diseases and cannot be cured (or treated, since nothing in psychiatry is ever cured) like diseases with drugs. The psychiatry disease angle is a scam.
Depression is a mental condition in which anger is repressed and turned inward toward one's self. It is overcome by introspecting to uproot the anger (best when done under the auspices of a qualified therapist), not by blocking dopamine or seratonin. Taking drugs to fix depression is like taking drugs to fix an amputated arm. The best course of action for dealing with depression is a combination of cognitive behaviour therapy and lots of physical exercise (one British study showed that walking more than 30 minutes a day was several times more effective than any available drug at fixing depression, and walking alone was more effective than walking while taking drugs, indicating that the drugs actually worsen the symptoms of depression!).
ADHD and all its various permutations (the more types of disorder the psychiatric community can create the more money they can make selling people drugs) are just names for being a boy and not having parents who do their job. The first undeniable truth about the universe everyone learns is that boys and girls are different. It has always been for hundreds of thousands of years that boys and girls think and learn differently, and within the larger categories of boys and girls are a whole spectrum of sub-types. None are wrong or defective or diseased, just different.
Unfortunately, the pussification of America threw that undeniable fact out and replaced it with the idea that everyone is the same and has to be taught the same and if anyone doesn't fit into that narrow mold they must be diseased. Since America was pussified and only girls have pussies, that means that girls are normal. If girls are normal then, by definition, boys must be defective. No longer do boys and girls think differently, needing different modes of learning and discipline. Nope, everyone must be taught the same and they must be taught like girls. Since boys don't learn like girls, since they want to run around and rough house and compete and follow rules and have winners and losers*, then boys must be defective. If boys are no longer allowed to win and lose, if they can't run and shout and mes around then of course they'll look for outlets to their masculinity where it is deemed inappropriate. They don't need drugs, they just need proper masculine discipline and training so they can grow up into proper men. They need parents who get off their fat asses and tell them to sit down and shut up when in public (behavioural training). They need to be told to follow rules begrudgingly and most of all they need a chance to rough house with one another outside and express their natural masculine violent proclivities.
Getting back to the topic at hand, or society is afflicted by the dreaded disease of Affluenza and it is Rarity who can show us the way to overcome this plague.
In the past century, more so the past 50 years, mores the past generation, and the past decade, Western society has become more affluent. We don't have to worry about working for our food, the government gives it to us and the grocery store is always fully stocked. We don't have to have twelve children because eight of them won't die from measles or whooping cough. We don't have to write letters or look for pay phones or wait to see our friends, they are always at hand. Our lives in the West have become so easy that we have become bored and must now look or excuses to complain about things. We have to work to find a reason to bitch and moan about how "unfair" our lives are. Our blessings are so many that we must focus on the few areas of our lives that contain lack for fear of being overwhelmed with gratitude. We are the 1% in all of human history, holding ore wealth and opulence than kings and emperors of years gone by could ever dream of. This is Affluenza.
The problem stems from two unhealthy byproducts of extreme affluence: narcissism and apathy. We literally throw away enough food to feed the entire world many times over. No one ever need go hungry, just kill the warlords and give the starving refugees the garbage we won't eat.
In Sweet and Elite we see Rarity, an affluent pony, stand in stark contrast with a rather uppity fellow from Canterlot, Jet Set, along with his wife Upper Crust. Jet Set and Upper Crust exemplify Affluenza. Against them is Rarity and her new friend (and mentor?) Fancy Pants, both of whom can keep their heads despite their success (though Fancy Pants plays coy to get Rarity to display her good nature, almost as a master would his apprentice). Fancy Pants urges Rarity on to defend her friends at the Canterlot Garden Party, however uncouth, or downright destructive, they may be. Jet Set and Upper Crust, stricken with Affluenza, are appalled at Rarity's display of her loyalty but they are quickly shot down by Fancy Pants coming to her aid.
Rarity exemplifies how to be good affluent. She shows us the way out of Affluenza, minus the occasional theatrics if we may be so inclined. I would advise all of you, myself included, and especially the occupy pussies, to look to Rarity as the inoculation against the dreaded disease of Affluenza. She just may be the one to save our world from self-destruction.
*My friends and I would play space marines and fight aliens with sticks and books, not like we were visiting neighbors, and we accepted the rules of the games as rules, sucking it up when we lost even if we didn't like it. We didn't demand do overs to boost our self esteem. We ran around and made lots of noise and fell down and got hurt. We may have cried but we knew we were supposed to be men so we got over it.
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